chemistry experiment

Mark 9:33-35

They came to Capernaum. When he was in the house, he asked them, “What were you arguing about on the road?” But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest.

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.”

He took a little child and had him stand among them. Taking him in his arms, he said to them,“Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me.”

I totally get what these guys were saying. 'Who's the best?' 'I want to be the best!'  I want to be the best at whatever it is I'm going for... maybe not the best, maybe the most significant would better describe how I feel.  I gave these feelings to God a couple of months ago. Mostly I just want to know Him and make Him happy!  And God, He leads us and causes this ugly "me 1st" or "me most" kind of attitude to rise up in us like a high school chemistry experiment exploding and bubbling over everything.  And it tastes like a mouth full of sand.  Giving it to God some more, its rising up and over, and it's out there available to give to Him or choose to keep it.  To be whole, I choose to give it away to God who can take it and replace it with what is meant to be there.  A servant's heart. A giving heart, able to give more of Christ away.  He died for the world, He is the servant of servants... we will never out give God.  He was and is more concerned for us than He is for Himself, which is pure love. We are so significant that Christ died for us, even when we were against Him.

1 John 4:10

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

1 John 3:16

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

Ephesians 3:16-19

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

True Love is the opposite of this concern and consumption with my own significance. I cannot truly give to another if my top concern is myself. And on the same token, I cannot serve and give to another with out first being aware of my own growth and finding significance in living in the Love of Christ. Thank you, Lord for causing this "chemistry experiment" in my heart... I give it to You so you can make my heart new, causing fresh water to stream through my heart so that all thats left is You. Love.