insecure.

I think this insecurity of mine has waxed my soul thin.  So thin that the present is pain, it is where the real me lives (or the me that I perceive) and it is painful.  I'm pretty sure that this is not how God sees me, at least I hope not.  This bout of sadness I'm recently experiencing is far different than times before when I would totally shut down & shut everyone out.  I can feel it being sloughed away, its still just as painful but we have to experience those things that God releases us from in order to be released.  Steady me God, Carry me Lord. I cannot move forward without You.  I'm pretty sure that this new habit of gratitude for everything I can find to be thankful for is part of what is pounding this painful insecurity out of me. You can read it by hovering the cursor over one of those black bars to the right.  Carried. Hopeful. Thankful. Redeemable.